Heart today, Head tomorrow
by golwenadaneth
Summary: Rose and the Doctor linger over thier true feelings, trying to work out what exactly if anything they should and do feel. Give it a read guys, Im quite proud of this, not too sappy, my usual m.o, lol. r&R, I live for feedback, so let me know.


All he ever did was watch. It was driving her crazy, every time she turned round she could feel his eyes on her. If he was so interested in her why did he only ever watch. Oh he'd danced, and they held hands, but apart from that, he just watched. He sent pins and needles up and down her spine every time he caressed her with his gaze, and she was so past horny at this point she thought she might start foaming at the mouth.

Jack was more hands on, he held her hand, danced with her, forever touching her shoulder or placing a guiding hand in the small of her back. They had a good thing going on, a team of three now instead of two, and that didn't make her feel as jealous as she'd thought it would. Still, Jack wasn't him, and the mere thought of his hand in hers didn't give her that good old fashioned low down tickle the way the Doctors did. She was livid with herself. she knew he would never act on it, knew she had no hope of a conclusion to the incredible sexual tension and chemistry that they both felt, but still she harboured that small spark of hope. He was after all in all his big eared, large nosed, snooty 'Im an alien and your an ape' way, sexy as hell. He knew her, like no other did, and yea she had told her mother that he was better than that, but right now she wished he wasn't, and he'd just do what men did best and crack onto her already.

The focus of her thoughts wandered into the control room where she was sat in contemplative silence.

"You all right?"

"Yea, just...thinking"

"Oh, what about, anything interestin"

"Nah"

Then she was silent again. She didn't notice him watching her this time, she was too deep in thought.

Gods, she was gorgeous, he had a hard time concentrating on anything else when she was around. He just knew it was gonna end in tears, it always did. He didn't do domestic, but the more time he spent with her, the more his little infatuation seemed to grow into something resembling real feelings. Time Lords didn't do this, they weren't meant to get attached to other species, especially humans, of all the different races and creatures they were the most under developed.

The great scope of their emotions was if nothing else a wonder, but also a hindrance, how many times had a human sacrificed himself for someone he loved, or mass murdered innocents because his childhood had been a bad one. He knew that was an unfair generalisation, but what was he supposed to do, he couldn't let himself get too involved with Rose, but something about her called to his soul, or what passed for a soul. He was metaphorically speaking, battered and bruised, maybe that was why he felt this need to be near her. Or maybe it was the fact that she seemed to see him, really see him, and what care for him, love him, enjoy him, none the less. He had so many times avoided her eyes for fear she would see the darkness in them, and turn away. Questions went un answered because it was too painful to remember, but he was cursed never to forget.

Yet she stayed, and she helped and she ran with him. Into all sorts of trouble, never questioning him, well, not too much. He chuckled to himself, that was another thing he absolutely adored about her. She was never afraid to stand up to him, never afraid to call him on his decisions if she didn't agree with them. such a strong young woman.

These growing feelings were confusing, but sometimes he just wanted to drop all his resolve and fall into her arms, he imagined they would be warm, and inviting, comforting aswell. He'd lived 900 years, and never felt this way. Yes, Romana had come close, and Grace, she was a wonderful woman, but no one had managed to break through his defenses the way this small fragile human girl had. Perhaps he should take that as a sign, in all his years he'd never really lived, just existed, hopping from one crisis or life and death situation to another. Now he had a purpose, to show this girl the universe. something she seemed ravenous for, wanted to consume every little bit of knowledge about, and never ran when she should, when she could die because of the decisions he made every day.

Jack wanted to fall into her arms aswell, he could see every time they were together. Not that he blamed the ex Time Agent, after all, what had he been mulling over for the past ten minutes. He was surprised when the first jolt of true jealousy had coursed through him, and then awed at the euphoric feeling he'd gotten when he realised that she didn't want Jack, didn't feel for him the way she felt for himself. Pure male pride had run through him as they had danced. He'd embarrassed his fellow time traveller in order to get Rose to come into his arms, if only briefly. He was telling himself it didn't matter if she chose Jack over him, and then when she hadn't he'd almost jumped for joy. Very un Time Lordish thing to do. Really, how old was he?

He was staring at her again. She felt that itch start at the base of her spine and take a slow torturous path through her body to her brain, which seemed to freeze, as if she'd drunk a slushy too quick. Her heart felt ready to pop. When she looked into her companions eyes, what she saw there made the butterflies in her stomach turn into bats. Such an intense look, burning through to her soul, if she didn't know otherwise she'd have sworn he could read her thoughts. The blue in his eyes swirled and dipped, as if the colour was changing and moving.

That tiny spark of hope reared itself again, it started as a tiny flash, and ended with her having to close her eyes and take a deep breath to calm her shaky nerves. Maybe he wasn't as un interested in her as she'd thought. That made her have to bite her lip to stop from beaming at him.

A slow sensuous smile spread across his face, his eyes sparkled with, what mischief, lust, a bit of both she thought. Perhaps they would dance again, perhaps they could dance until her head swam, that would be nice, that would be very nice.

He knew what he was doing, he could see Rose squirm in her seat, under his intense gaze she seemed almost mesmerised, and he felt his hearts pick up the pace a little, his breath caught in his throat. He just couldn't help himself, he knew that it was wrong, and he should never have let his feelings become so, what thick, intense, lustful, yes definitely lust filled. But in all his life times, his many reincarnations and regenerations he'd learnt just one thing, life, for some was far too short. Maybe he shouldn't ignore what his heart told him today because his head was telling him what could happen tomorrow. Rose was a truly remarkable young woman, and right now he was debating on how best to approach all this with her when she spoke up, in a voice that bellied her seemingly calm exterior.

"Doc...Doctor?"

"Yes Rose" she seemed ready to speak up and say somthing, but what exactly, and then she smiled that smile, teeth under the tongue, smirk firmly in place.

"So... where to now"

With that she smiled at him, a mega watt grin that banished his misgivings and made him almost skip to the controls.

"I dunno Rose, where d,ya fancy this time"

""I fought we could go ruin a revolution, run for our lifes, an maybe sell Jack into slavery, ya know, a normal day"

He laughed, full and throaty, yes, he needed to stop worrying for the future, and live today, because in his infinite wisdom he had managed to pick up this wonderful girl, and he wanted to, no needed to know where this would lead them. It was shaping up to be a fan_tas_tic day. Rules be damned. this one he was playing for himself.

"Your wish...

"Is my command?"

"Yea, sommint like that"

Both smiling, and both, hoping for the best, they sent the TARDIS off into another adventure.

This was going to be...interesting.


End file.
